A tired week is not a reason to skip the date. It is the week a marriage needs one most, and the week each of you needs the other to carry some of the load.
Twenty minutes, once the house is quiet, and nobody has to say when to stop.
What you need
Lotion, or coconut oil from the kitchen
A bath towel
One phone, to use as the timer
The plan
Bedroom door shut. Overhead light off, one bedside lamp on. Use a towel to keep the lotion/oil off the sheets.
Set the phone's timer (gentle tone!) for ten minutes and put it face down on the dresser, out of reach. Neither of you touches it again until it goes off.
One of you lies face down on the towel. The other starts at the neck, then the shoulders, the space between the shoulder blades, and the lower back.
When the timer goes, stop, even mid-stroke. Nobody asks for one more minute and nobody asks if that was enough. Reset it for ten and swap.
When the second timer goes, whoever is giving gets up and turns it off.
For extra credit, give each other a face massage, five minutes each on the timer. Run your thumbs along the jaw line, the eyebrows, the temples and the bridge of the nose.
Then both of you lie down side by side, lamp still on, and talk.
The conversation
One. Where do you carry stress: neck, shoulders or lower back? Did I find the spot?
Two. What is one thing coming up this week that I could take off your plate?
Three. What is weighing on you right now that you have not said out loud?
Add this date to your calendar
It lands on Wednesday night. Move it to whichever night works, then invite your partner so it is on both calendars.
What month is your anniversary? Tap it below. Just the month, no day needed. It is used to send you something useful around that time of year.